I live with my dad. My mom is married to another guy, and they have four kids. Neither mom or her husband work, so they’re on social services. My dad on the other hand makes really good money, and since I’m his only kid he spends a lot on me.
When I visit mom I get bad-mouthed constantly about how easy I have it. My two sisters are always stealing clothes from me, and mom’s always complaining about how I’m prissy because I don’t want to do chores while I’m at her house. She’s wrong. I don’t mind chores, but on the weekends that I’m there they dump everything on me. They act like I’m a maid. I’m expected to do the dishes, all the sweeping and vacuuming, the laundry, and even some of the cooking. I’m there as a guest. I don’t think that’s fair.
Also mom does nothing but drink. She barely talks to me aside from complaining about me, and when she’s really drunk she becomes verbally violent. The only people I even like seeing there are my oldest brother and step-dad. They’re both cool to me.
The truth is that I don’t love my mom. She’s someone I’m forced to have in my life. I know that if you’re above a certain age you can decide for yourself who you stay with, but I don’t know if I can outright refuse to visit her anymore. Anyone know?
I Hate Visiting My Mom. Do I Have To?
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When I was 14 I was in a similar position. My parents are divorced and I hated going over my moms. My parents had split custody of me and on a day when it was time for me to go to my moms I finally decided that I didn’t want to. She called the police and they came to my dads house. The officers spoke with me and it was really rather simple. They asked “do you know this is your mom’s day to have custody of you?” I replied “yes”. And they asked “is your father making you stay?” (which is what my mom accused my dad of doing) and I said “no I want to be with my dad I don’t want to go over my moms”. And that was it. They were not going to handcuff me and drag me out of the house to my moms. My mom never lost custody of me, but they will never force a child to leave one of their parents if they willingly decide not to. This happened in the state of Florida so I can’t guarantee the laws are the same wherever you’re from; however I would think it is unlikely it would be much different.
Since they are on social services and she drinks a lot and gets verbally violent that’s not good for the kids. You could contact social services maybe they could help tell them what is going on and you don’t want to be in that kind of unstable environment.
i grew up in the foster care system and children 12 and abover are given the chioce.. i dont see why you and your dad couldnt go to court and tell the judge how you feel and get her rights terminated.. if your better off with your dad then the system wont fight it.. just ask you dad about how that works and do some research
Im not sure how old you are but I believe at 13 your dad can take you to court and you can tell the judge you don’t want to go anymore. That will keep your dad out of trouble and you don’t have to be unhappy.
Tell your dad what you have told us here. Let him know that you no longer want to
spend time with mom. I only had one problem with your question. You are not a guest when you are with family. You are family. When you visit friends then you are a guest.
Really talk to your dad about how you feel . Tell him all she does is drink & she gets violent & tell him it bothers you .Tell him you don’t like her & you don’t want to see her agian .
Tell your dad you’re not going anymore, because you’re old enough.
just leave the house and live with your dad or tell the cops that your mom is acting fair
I think you should talk about the situation with your father and tell him that you don’t wish to see your mother anymore. I don’t think that just because she’s your mother you should be forced to love her or visit her. If it doesn’t make you happy and she’s setting a very bad example, you should’t go. You can always see your brother and step dad in other places. Very good luck and I wish you the best!
How old are you? You seem very mature and insightful to be taking any verbal abuse, even from your alcoholic mother. What state do you live in? Talk to Dad and tell him she and your siblings are abusive to you, and get the police or DCF involved if you have to. Do what you have to do NOW to take care of YOU, or it WILL get worse! Trust me, I know. Good luck Sweetie.
Talk to your father about this. Yes, you do have rights; how they are dealt with depends on your age. When children are 12 (New York State) they can be heard in a court of law regarding their wishes for visitation with their parents. you do not have to take the abuse, nor should you. you can also call the child abuse hot line anytime; the number is in every phone book. BUT, talk to your father, that is the most important thing you can do!